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第89章(第1页)

HadElizabethsopinionbeenalldrawnfromherownfamily,shecouldnothaveformedaverypleasingpictureofconjugalfelicityordomesticcomfort。Herfather,captivatedbyyouthandbeauty,andthatappearanceofgoodhumourwhichyouthandbeautygenerallygive,hadmarriedawomanwhoseweakunderstandingandilliberalmindhadveryearlyintheirmarriageputanendtoallrealaffectionforher。Respect,esteem,andconfidencehadvanishedforever;andallhisviewsofdomestichappinesswereoverthrown。ButMr。Bennetwasnotofadispositiontoseekcomfortforthedisappointmentwhichhisownimprudencehadbroughton,inanyofthosepleasureswhichtoooftenconsoletheunfortunatefortheirfollyortheirvice。Hewasfondofthecountryandofbooks;andfromthesetasteshadarisenhisprincipalenjoyments。Tohiswifehewasverylittleotherwiseindebted,thanasherignoranceandfollyhadcontributedtohisamusement。Thisisnotthesortofhappinesswhichamanwouldingeneralwishtoowetohiswife;butwhereotherpowersofentertainmentarewanting,thetruephilosopherwillderivebenefitfromsuchasaregiven。

Elizabeth,however,hadneverbeenblindtotheimproprietyofherfathersbehaviourasahusband。Shehadalwaysseenitwithpain;butrespectinghisabilities,andgratefulforhisaffectionatetreatmentofherself,sheendeavouredtoforgetwhatshecouldnotoverlook,andtobanishfromherthoughtsthatcontinualbreachofconjugalobligationanddecorumwhich,inexposinghiswifetothecontemptofherownchildren,wassohighlyreprehensible。Butshehadneverfeltsostronglyasnowthedisadvantageswhichmustattendthechildrenofsounsuitableamarriage,noreverbeensofullyawareoftheevilsarisingfromsoill-judgedadirectionoftalents;talents,which,rightlyused,mightatleasthavepreservedtherespectabilityofhisdaughters,evenifincapableofenlargingthemindofhiswife。

WhenElizabethhadrejoicedoverWickhamsdeparture,shefoundlittleothercauseforsatisfactioninthelossoftheregiment。Theirpartiesabroadwerelessvariedthanbefore,andathomeshehadamotherandsisterwhoseconstantrepiningsatthedullnessofeverythingaroundthemthrewarealgloomovertheirdomesticcircle;and,thoughKittymightintimeregainhernaturaldegreeofsense,sincethedisturbersofherbrainwereremoved,herothersister,fromwhosedispositiongreaterevilmightbeapprehended,waslikelytobehardenedinallherfollyandassurancebyasituationofsuchdoubledangerasawatering-placeandacamp。Uponthewhole,therefore,shefound,whathasbeensometimesfoundbefore,thataneventtowhichshehadbeenlookingforwardwithimpatientdesiredidnot,intakingplace,bringallthesatisfactionshehadpromisedherself。Itwasconsequentlynecessarytonamesomeotherperiodforthecommencementofactualfelicity—tohavesomeotherpointonwhichherwishesandhopesmightbefixed,andbyagainenjoyingthepleasureofanticipation,consoleherselfforthepresent,andprepareforanotherdisappointment。HertourtotheLakeswasnowtheobjectofherhappiestthoughts;itwasherbestconsolationforalltheuncomfortablehourswhichthediscontentednessofhermotherandKittymadeinevitable;andcouldshehaveincludedJaneinthescheme,everypartofitwouldhavebeenperfect。

“Butitisfortunate,”thoughtshe,“thatIhavesomethingtowishfor。Werethewholearrangementcomplete,mydisappointmentwouldbecertain。Buthere,bycarryingwithmeoneceaselesssourceofregretinmysistersabsence,Imayreasonablyhopetohaveallmyexpectationsofpleasurerealised。Aschemeofwhicheverypartpromisesdelightcanneverbesuccessful;andgeneraldisappointmentisonlywardedoffbythedefenceofsomelittlepeculiarvexation。”

WhenLydiawentawayshepromisedtowriteveryoftenandveryminutelytohermotherandKitty;butherletterswerealwayslongexpected,andalwaysveryshort。Thosetohermothercontainedlittleelsethanthattheywerejustreturnedfromthelibrary,wheresuchandsuchofficershadattendedthem,andwhereshehadseensuchbeautifulornamentsasmadeherquitewild;thatshehadanewgown,oranewparasol,whichshewouldhavedescribedmorefully,butwasobligedtoleaveoffinaviolenthurry,asMrs。Forstercalledher,andtheyweregoingtothecamp;andfromhercorrespondencewithhersister,therewasstilllesstobelearnt—forherletterstoKitty,thoughratherlonger,weremuchtoofulloflinesunderthewordstobemadepublic。

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